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from Ayy by Ben Lazarus




This is written to my mom, who passed away in 2017. She was a devout Christian Scientist and refused any and all medical treatment. She relied on prayer for her health and spent the last months of her life at a religious care facility praying to heal herself from cancer. This song is sad and heavy, but I feel a little lighter after writing it.

~ Ben



I’m alone and asking why
You knew the truth and still you died
All ‘cause you believed a lie

Your faith meant the most
To you and so I’m here
Writing these verses to a ghost

Your devotion gave you pride
When you got sick you had to hide
Old friends called you and you lied

But they would do the same
In your shoes ‘cause to them
Illness is a thing of shame

Radical reliance
No word of health or science
Is mentioned in your book

Spiritually denying
The fact that you were dying
You were scared of how you’d look

If you hear me from beyond
You know I’m bitter that you’re gone
But I’m here and moving on

I do my best each day
To honor you and now
I’ve finally brought myself to pray


from Ayy, released November 22, 2022

Stream ALL Ben Lazarus music on Spotify: open.spotify.com/artist/5zlNNutCANfivGZKE5Lxgx?si=RNPiowUXQ3Wr_-Q-9I0bwA


Written, Composed & Produced by: Ben Lazarus
Executive Producer: Andrew Napier
Vocals, Bass & Keyboards: Ben Lazarus
Drums & Percussion: Frank Hegyi
Mixing & Mastering Engineer: Greg Francis
Album Art: Ashley Bradley
Released by: Napier Records

© 2023 Napier Records



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Ben Lazarus Los Angeles, California

Ben Lazarus is a Los Angeles based singer-songwriter and multi-instrumentalist. His songs are short, sweet, strangely honest and honestly strange. Lazarus is signed to Napier Records, a label founded by Academy award-winning filmmaker Andrew Napier.

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