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from Cold Cuts by Ben Lazarus




A song about a guy named Seth. It was made for him in trade for something...



There’s this guy I know
He’s real special to me
His name is Seth and he’s six foot three
So this is for you Seth

If aliens abducted Seth and made a sandwich out of him
They would save his testicles to create a superhuman race

Seth is endowed with an enormous penis
That bounces between his ankles when he walks

If Seth were president
He would wear a g-string with stars and stripes on it

If he got in a fight with Colonel Sanders
There would be hell to pay

If Seth were an ice cream flavor
Ben and Jerry would hide him from the public to prevent mass hysteria

If Seth drove a truck
It would have many bells and whistles

I enjoy Seth over breakfast cereal
And with my coffee in the morning

But don’t just listen to me
Listen to what these satisfied customers have to say

Seth balanced my checkbook
And got rid of that ugly semen stain on the couch

I first heard about Seth on the internet, I’m hooked

Who’s Seth?
Seth fathered three of my children


from Cold Cuts, released November 11, 2022

Stream ALL Ben Lazarus music on Spotify: open.spotify.com/artist/5zlNNutCANfivGZKE5Lxgx?si=RNPiowUXQ3Wr_-Q-9I0bwA


Vocals, Bass, Keyboards, Flute, Producer, Writer: Ben Lazarus
Mastering Engineer: Greg Francis
Mixing Engineer: Ben Lazarus
Released by: Napier Records

© 2021 Napier Records



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Ben Lazarus Los Angeles, California

Ben Lazarus is a Los Angeles based singer-songwriter and multi-instrumentalist. His songs are short, sweet, strangely honest and honestly strange. Lazarus is signed to Napier Records, a label founded by Academy award-winning filmmaker Andrew Napier.

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